Anxious

Ahhh just a little less than 9 weeks till my due date. But, if I have learned anything, its that a due date is just another day. My kids have always come on their own due dates, their own timing. So I guess we shall see. It seems as though through my pregnancies when I hit the 10 week markers it brings me great joy and great anticipation at the same time. When i hit 10 weeks, I remember thinking, "ok this sickness will only last for 8 more weeks!" But then there is the though of oh man, I have 30 more weeks of this??? Then at 20 weeks there is the thought of being halfway there and getting the ultrasound to make sure baby is healthy and good. I love this point, its still early enough to relish in feeling so great, the tummy starts to show and movement begins. Its a good phase. 30 weeks hits and its the homestreach!!! I feel so close and yet so far away at the same time. There is so much to look forward to and so much work yet to be done. I am having a hard time imagining an actual child yet....I know, its kinda weird. But my mind is on finishing this pregnancy strong and then its on the actual delivery process. I feel as though I tend to separate having a baby and being pregnant. It sounds so weird now that I am writing it down, but its still true. I will think about nursing, sleeping habits, pacifiers, etc... after the baby comes. I have to be focused now on the goal of giving this child all of my health and care right where they are at now. Then when they are here, I will give them all of the care they need at that point. I am learning everyday to focus just on that day. To trust Jesus with my worries and concerns for tomorrow and make this day all that I can. I am focusing on tending to this child and my other children's needs this day. I am begging Jesus for strength through the next weeks as we anxiously await the birth of this little life. God is so faithful and good to me. I am so grateful to be His.