If you know me, you know I LOVE being a mom. I love waking up early to my kids voices, I love making their meals fun for them to eat, I love taking them on walks, watching their movies, playing barbies, playing superman, crawling on the floor and so much more. I get great joy out of conversations with my kids and hearing their voices. I love to see them smile and laugh and I will do whatever it takes to get them to do it. My heart is all in it. My heart is a mom. So the questions I have been facing lately is....Who am I outside of being a mom and wife? What is my passion and woman and individual? What is my identity? I find so much of me gets caught up in being a mom and wife, and to be honest, I dont mind. I love it. But really, in 5 or so years when my kids are in school and James is at work and I am home alone.....who am I? Will I be sad and lonely because i have put all of my effort and time into motherhood that I find myself lost? I really dont know. I do know that I am passionate about life and I have great passion for Jr. High kids. I am in school now and hope to finish in the next 2 years. I want to finish in psychology and maybe get my masters in counseling so that I could be a jr. high school counselor some day. Even the idea behind this dream job is working around when my kids are in school and being available to them. But for right now I believe with all of my heart that my passion and my best effort should be going towards being a mom and wife. This is who I am, these are the precious lives that I am blessed with raising to grow into adults. This is my job and I take it very seriously. One day again i will get to focus on me and figure out what I want to do. And I trust that Jesus will walk through that time with me. But for now, I believe I am called to be a mom and wife. This is my heart. This is the identity through Christ that he so graciously gave me.
So I am going to take the days to soak up playing trains, watching elmo, reading books, snuggling for naps, hearing sweet voices, going to the park, and so much more. Even on the hardest of days, like ummmm yesterday when my 2 year old got out of the car in the grocery store parking lot and booked it in the store running the isles and when my 6 year old is sad cause of girls at school and my 8 month old is screaming her brains out from teething, I will find great joy in the times that I get to be their mom. I am the safest place on this earth for them. I am the one they get to melt down infront of or act as crazy as possible and they know they are loved. Once again, I love being a mom more than anything. Thank you Jesus!
